It was the end of a decade, but the start of an age – Taylor Swift
How have we made it through the 2010’s? Suddenly, we’re back into the roaring twenties, just with much less snazzy outfits. Slightly disappointing really.
I’m not usually one for looking to the year ahead and making resolutions, so I won’t do that. I won’t give myself a 100 tasks to complete within the month of January, I know I’ll never stick to them and that’s okay. I have looked forward to the things coming my way this year though.
For me, 2020 is about finding my own feet, my own voice, my own life. It’s about focusing on my own needs to be sure I can enjoy this next trip round the sun.
This will be the one and only year I have 2020 vision – metaphorically obviously, I’m still blind AF.
This year, I’ve started on my own and that’s fine by me. I realised in 2019 the negative effects of relationships and trying to force something to be what it’s not. It’s shown me what I don’t want, it’s shown me boundaries I need to have and it’s allowed me to find myself in the chaos that last year was. I won’t regret it, even when I start to struggle with the facts of it all.
Although, 2020 is seeing exciting things for me in regards to writing. I’m on two contributors lists, which is two more than last year! And it sees me fall, hopefully with grace, into a work placement at my local newspaper. It’ll see me passing my HNC in Practical Journalism – if I ever get the hang of Shorthand and potentially finding work from there. It’s an exciting prospect, to know I’m in a course I actually want to take further. It’s funny, a course I avoided for years is the one that’s made the most sense to me now.
This is the year I want to explore who I am while getting my shit together. I thought I’d love turning 22 and while I get to really mean it when I sing-scream “I DON’T KNOW ABOUT YOU BUT I’M FEELING 22!!!!” I feel this dense panic looming over me. Why? No idea. I’m 22, not 82 and yet I feel like I should’ve sorted myself out by now.
So alas, it’s time to focus on me. It’s time to nurture my soul and let myself heal. It’s time to see my friends and visit my family. It’s time to see places and enjoy the views around me. Wear new clothes, enjoy the curly girl life, bathe in all things that make myself feel more like me.
For the sake of not jinxing it, I’m not saying 2020 is going to be my year however it feels so calming to know it might just be the year I feel a little more like me.
Much love x